Thursday, May 18, 2017

Fell On Black Days

I'm heartbroken today.

My husband called at seven this morning to tell me Chris Cornell had passed away. I was still asleep and tried to wrap my groggy mind around the news. As I got my children ready for school, my thoughts raced. I'd actually had "All Night Thing" stuck in my head since five a.m. because I think I had a dream with the song in it.

Now that the children are off to school, it's sinking in. My thoughts are with his family, friends, and all those who loved him.

I don't usually do posts like this, but anyone who knows me understands how much I love Chris Cornell and his music. For me, this isn't just another celebrity passing away, it's like losing a friend. I've been a fan since Soundgarden's early days. Fell On Black Days was my high school theme song (even though it didn't come out until my second last year of high school). When I'm having a rough day, I often put on Cornell's music--Soundgarden, Audioslave, Temple of The Dog, solo, it doesn't matter--the music helps bring me back to centre. His music has helped bring me back from the edge more than once. I've found inspiration in some of his interviews, especially ones where he's talked about his own creative struggles. I've used many of his songs as soundtracks for my writing.

He's touched my life in many ways and his music has always been there when I've needed it. I'm upset that there will be no more and I won't get to see him perform again.

I saw him with my husband over a year and a half ago. It the the first concert we saw when we decided that we'd go to a concert every year for our anniversary. I was so excited that I didn't sleep for over a week before the show. It was ridiculous how excited I was. I'd blogged about my experience (here) and still wasn't able to fully capture what his show meant to me. And when I woke up to this tweet:


my mind was blown that he'd possibly took the time to read what I'd written. 

He was an amazingly talented singer and songwriter. His words and music helped so many people (I've been reading the Twitter feed all morning). No matter what I write here, it doesn't seem to do justice to the loss I feel.

I hope the initial reports are wrong with the talk of suicide. It's a good reminder to be kind to people. Everyone is struggling with something that you don't know. Sometimes a kind word or gesture is all it takes to lift someone's spirits. Depression is a very dark place, and those who haven't struggled with it will never understand what that pit is like. We all smile and put on our happy faces for the world, but behind those masks some people are having a hard time putting one foot in front of the other.

Thank you, Chris, for the amazing memories and music you left us.


No comments:

Post a Comment